Origin Story

Hi bro, welcome to a little origin story about who I am and why I do this work.

My name is Ben, and I’m the founder of MADE, a community of 🏳️‍🌈 sexually diverse men. This work is personal to me, rooted not just in my experiences but in my ongoing story of resilience.

I grew up in a conservative Catholic household in Andrews, Texas. From a young age, I knew I was different, navigating my identity as a queer kid in a world that wasn’t designed for me. My journey with sexuality began very early, including sexual trauma and exposure to sex at a young age.

From the age of 14, I found myself drawn to connecting with men online via webcam, stepping into what would become a lifelong journey. Masturbating on webcam and modeling for the first time in my teens, doing this my whole life, I never understood what I was doing, only that it always felt natural. My earliest memories of exhibitionism started around this same time, and I never fathomed that sex work would be a part of my story.

At 18, I joined the Marine Corps during the Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell era, serving two tours in Afghanistan and earning a Purple Heart. Those years taught me strength, but also the toll of hiding who I truly was. I didn’t come out until I was 27, and while it was liberating, it came with rejection from my family and continues to challenge me to rebuild my identity on my own terms, again and again.

But there’s another chapter to this story—one that’s harder to talk about, but just as important. For the past year and a half, I’ve been struggling with sexual OCD. It’s a condition that’s been debilitating, consuming, and isolating. My obsessions revolve around fears of perversion—what it means, how it’s perceived, and how it shapes my interactions. These obsessions spark intense anxiety, especially in public spaces.

I also deal with compulsions that stem from this anxiety. When I feel socially anxious, my eyes might fixate on others’ bodies in ways that feel awkward or unwanted. I’ve experienced spontaneous feelings of sexuality in moments or settings where they don’t belong. This combination of obsessions, compulsions, and anxiety has been a challenge. But it’s also been a catalyst.

Now, as a casual sex worker, I am using my unique experience to claim parts of me that have been rejected for too long. MADE is how I am writing this story of resilience. It’s my way of turning struggle into something meaningful—a space where 🏳️‍🌈 sexually diverse men can connect, grow, and heal. MADE is about creating spaces where we can discuss identity, sexuality, and mental health openly, without fear or shame.

This is why I’ve committed to building MADE. It’s not just a business; it’s a beacon for those who, like me, are navigating the complexities of identity and mental health. It’s for everyone who’s ever felt unseen or unworthy, to remind us all that we are not alone—and that we can thrive together.

MADE Tease: Direct message '👀 Perv' on Discord to win access to a role playing event. Here is the link to jump in: https://discord.gg/HjkDWVjtYA